5 more days to my thearpy.
I've been telling myself to forget everything that have been happening in the past.
I shouldnt have still lived in the past.
Out of so many choices and so many exits, i still chose the dead end.
I have totally stopped thinking about it.
Its another new life now.
However i feel so trapped.
Just like the bird in the bird cage.
Without freedom, without air.
Im a bird with wings, however, my wings could flap no more.
Its like stuck in the cage, no longer able to flap anymore.
As wad i told my cousin the day before, i feel as if im a burden, slowling the pace of everyone around me.
everything they have to do, they have to take to a concern for me.
Now i understand. No one can understand the pain im in now.
Its not juz the physical pain im in.
Its the mental and emotional pain im in.
Everyone is asking me why this why that.
but i really dun have the answer.
everyone tells me if i really have problems i have to say them all out so that they could be solved.
but in the true fact, i dun even noe wad are the problems im facing.

im oso in pain in searching for the reasons why am i so trapped.
i cried in pain not coz i have problems that cant be solved.
i cried in pain coz my heart aches however i couldnt find the way out.
crying is the only way that my heart feels right.
coz no one can really understand tat i really dun nid them to be always supervising me.
im a grown up, 18 year old young adult.
i really nid some freedom.
Do you understand?
i would like to stand up on my own since im the one who started everything first.
im tired not coz i have not enuff slp.
Its coz all this ups and downs.
i really had enuff.
it made me feel living another day is really hard.
i need my room of space.
Bring me to outer space, where i could be alone.